Jump to content

Pre-marriage Stress..


glitterfish

Recommended Posts

  • Regular Member

So as most of you know, I am getting married in September this year. I am trying to plan it all myself without the help of a wedding planner. Boy, if only I knew what I was getting myself into! I have an appointment with 2 prospective reception places Saturday so I am trying to get a list of questions made PLUS a menu rough draft. We are planning on doing just an appetizer buffet type deal. I want the reception to have a oriental feel so thinking of things along the theme and in the lower price range is difficult. I am thinking of doing a few Chinese type things (mini egg rolls, chicken skewers, fried dumplings) plus american (silver dollar sandwiches, potato skins, veggie tray). When is enough enough? I don't want people leaving early because they are starving! :krazy:

So has anyone planned their own wedding? Any questions I should be asking? Any menu ideas? Decorating ideas(along the oriental theme, I have been thinking small lighted ficus trees, paper lanterns, colors are mostly black and white with some red)? :rofl

Any words of advice?

WHEW! :rolleyes:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest MommySam0618
So as most of you know, I am getting married in September this year. I am trying to plan it all myself without the help of a wedding planner. Boy, if only I knew what I was getting myself into! I have an appointment with 2 prospective reception places Saturday so I am trying to get a list of questions made PLUS a menu rough draft. We are planning on doing just an appetizer buffet type deal. I want the reception to have a oriental feel so thinking of things along the theme and in the lower price range is difficult. I am thinking of doing a few Chinese type things (mini egg rolls, chicken skewers, fried dumplings) plus american (silver dollar sandwiches, potato skins, veggie tray). When is enough enough? I don't want people leaving early because they are starving! :krazy:

So has anyone planned their own wedding? Any questions I should be asking? Any menu ideas? Decorating ideas(along the oriental theme, I have been thinking small lighted ficus trees, paper lanterns, colors are mostly black and white with some red)? :rofl

Any words of advice?

WHEW! :rolleyes:

I planned my own wedding and I swear I almost had a mental break down!! I did make the day happen for a friend and it's much more fun being over someone elses wedding than being over your own! For what you are wanting reception wise your food sounds spot on. Maybe throw a fruit and cheese tray in there and viola! When it comes to planning the food, the important thing is what time is your wedding to take place. If it's around a meal time you will need to have more on hand than say if it were to be held at 10am or 2 pm, most people have eaten and wont feel the need to pig out at your reception. You need to have a good idea of how many people (a given I know) you are planning to have and how much room you think your decor will take up when deciding on your reception hall. It's EASY to go over budget when it comes to the reception.

You need to ask about tables and chairs, can you use theirs, is there an extra cost? Do they provide table cloths or seat covers(if you want them)? Are you responsible for clean up after the party or do they have a clean up crew and how much does that cost? How early can you be let in to set up? How late can you stay?

If you need to vent about any of it feel free to email me! lol I've been there done that!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Regular Member

LOL no clue what to tell you.

My wedding cost all of 300 bucks and I planned it in a month. We did the Church but no white dress I just could not bring myself to spend that much money on a dress I would only wear once. So bought a dress I could wear again. My husband had new jeans and a dress shirt and sneakers. Family and close friends only.

We had the reception at the trailer we were buying, only us and my best freind and her husband. We grilled out and made margaritas. Part of the money I spent on nice silk sheets and gave the preacher some for use of the Church.

I loved it and would not change a thing. It was about us. Try to remember its about you and your husband to be and don't sweat the rest.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Regular Member

Wow thanks Samantha! I know, I am so stressed!! My fiance thinks I'm way ahead of myself but the wedding is in 9 months! :krazy: I'm kind of alone in the planning so it's hard!

We're planning of having the reception around 6pm with the ceremony around 4pm. It goes right over dinner time!

We're only going to have around 50-60 guests and the reception place is just the right size(if we go with that one). What did you have to eat at your reception? How about your friend?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Regular Member
LOL no clue what to tell you.

My wedding cost all of 300 bucks and I planned it in a month. We did the Church but no white dress I just could not bring myself to spend that much money on a dress I would only wear once. So bought a dress I could wear again. My husband had new jeans and a dress shirt and sneakers. Family and close friends only.

We had the reception at the trailer we were buying, only us and my best freind and her husband. We grilled out and made margaritas. Part of the money I spent on nice silk sheets and gave the preacher some for use of the Church.

I loved it and would not change a thing. It was about us. Try to remember its about you and your husband to be and don't sweat the rest.

Nice and easy.. I like it! Im not planning on having a huge bash but I kind of have an idea of what I do want. It's just that Ive never planned a wedding for myself or anyone else before so Im like :krazy:

:D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest MommySam0618
Wow thanks Samantha! I know, I am so stressed!! My fiance thinks I'm way ahead of myself but the wedding is in 9 months! :krazy: I'm kind of alone in the planning so it's hard!

We're planning of having the reception around 6pm with the ceremony around 4pm. It goes right over dinner time!

We're only going to have around 50-60 guests and the reception place is just the right size(if we go with that one). What did you have to eat at your reception? How about your friend?

I pulled my wedding off in 3 MONTHS!! you can do it in 9 with ease!

With it being at 6 I would have a small selection of food but a lot of it. The less variety the cheaper it will be.

I got married at 2 reception at 3 so we had wedding cake and grooms cake, fruit and a chocolate fountain, crackers and cheese a coffee service and doughnuts. We only had 40 maybe 50 people and a super cheap buget. I went over on flowers so I had to skimp on the reception but I think it was pulled off rather well!!

My friend wanted a full meal at hers. She was married at 6 then fed everyone at 7. She had Spaghetti, of all things!!She was lucky she didn't get any on her dress!! Spaghetti, garden side salad and french bread. She also had cheese fondu and different types of breads, fruit, and her wedding cake was cupcakes. It was super cute and REALLY EASY to dress up and much less expensive than cake which gave her more money to put into the food.

You really have to buget well in the food department! :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Regular Member

KEep in mind what the wedding is FOR. You are going into a relationship that should last the rest of your life. In the big scope of things - the wedding day is just the tiniest part - barely important at all. IF you let it overshadow the rest of your life you will be missing a lot in life.

No matter how "wonderful" the wedding bash is, no matter how may friends you have or how perfect the ceremony or how many videos you have taken, you will not remember it that well in a few years. So put your energy into the love of your life - your best friend - and do not fret so much about the "perfect menu" or "perfect dress" or the music or deco or anything. It is just not that important.

If you are trying to do more than you are comfortable doing, then you are trying to do too much. Relax and enjoy these days as they come.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Regular Member
Wow thanks Samantha! I know, I am so stressed!! My fiance thinks I'm way ahead of myself but the wedding is in 9 months! :krazy: I'm kind of alone in the planning so it's hard!

We're planning of having the reception around 6pm with the ceremony around 4pm. It goes right over dinner time!

We're only going to have around 50-60 guests and the reception place is just the right size(if we go with that one). What did you have to eat at your reception? How about your friend?

I pulled my wedding off in 3 MONTHS!! you can do it in 9 with ease!

With it being at 6 I would have a small selection of food but a lot of it. The less variety the cheaper it will be.

I got married at 2 reception at 3 so we had wedding cake and grooms cake, fruit and a chocolate fountain, crackers and cheese a coffee service and doughnuts. We only had 40 maybe 50 people and a super cheap buget. I went over on flowers so I had to skimp on the reception but I think it was pulled off rather well!!

My friend wanted a full meal at hers. She was married at 6 then fed everyone at 7. She had Spaghetti, of all things!!She was lucky she didn't get any on her dress!! Spaghetti, garden side salad and french bread. She also had cheese fondu and different types of breads, fruit, and her wedding cake was cupcakes. It was super cute and REALLY EASY to dress up and much less expensive than cake which gave her more money to put into the food.

You really have to buget well in the food department! :)

:D I went with FAKE flowers! :rofl I have a friend making the bouquets and corsages, ect so that was cheap for me.

Those chocolate fountains are so cool but the prices seem out of this world! So yummy though!

OK so Ill probably stick with what I have, I have room to cut things if I have to and maybe have more of the same of something else.

Daryl, thanks for the words of wisdom as always! Like I said, Im not having this bash to impress anyone but I want something nice since I only plan on getting married ONCE! :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest MommySam0618

my grandma throws parties all the time so she has a chocolate fountain...so it was FREEEE! As was the church and reception hall :)

My friend, the spaghetti one, had fake flowers at hers and they were beautiful!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Regular Member

I cannot imagine trying to do all that! My brother and sister in law had small backyard wedding, with an arbor and some folding chairs and then a reception where they cooked all the food it was all Brazillian food so I can't help ya out there, she baked her own cake and I made the groom's cake (it was a pretty sweet R2D2 cake even if I do say so myself) and eventhought they spent very little and it wasn't all fancy is was the BEST wedding I have ever been to. It made the day about them and not the surroundings. You know what would be cool, I just thought of this, a build your own pasta dish buffet type thing, it would be so easy and cheap and a neat idea you could have different types of pasta cooked, different sauces, and things to add (italian sausage, cheeses, hamburger meat, etc..) and it would satisfy all different people vegitarians and carnivors a like, but you may not be going for a sit down kinda reception. Anyway, take a deep breath and have fun!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Regular Member
:) Thanks for the opinions guys! We met with the event manager today and got some things talked over so Im feeling a bit better today! I am just waiting to hear back on a few things and get a few more questions answered before signing the contract. I am looking into decor now and having fun with it! This place called Oriental Trading has all sorts of neat things for wholesale prices.. a lot of Asian themed items as well! :nana
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Regular Member

Hi Glitter, and congrats to the wedding.

I am also suffering from pre-marriage stress, as I will sing at my niece' wedding in August. I want everything to be perfect, everyone will be there. I am making a dress, in green, pattern is here, the dark blue one:

http://www.mccallpattern.com/item/M9456.ht...9456&page=1

Today I made the perfect belt, the silver chain.

Picture27419-2.jpg

I should loose some weight too........ I don't want my niece to be ashamed of her old aunt...

She and her boyfriend started their preparations a year ago!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Regular Member
Try to remember its about you and your husband to be and don't sweat the rest.
I've gotta say, that's the BEST piece of advice that ANYONE can give you! It's meant to be YOUR day and bugger what anyone else thinks!

I planned our wedding too, I opted for as much personal/homemade stuff as possible as I wanted the day to be about us, not how much money I could give planners etc... I made my dress, I got married/had reception in the garden of a friend's farm, as 'payment' for the venue, a couple of months before the wedding I got all my bridesmaids to come help me plant/weed my friends garden (about 2 acres of garden :thud:) so it would be right for the day (we married in spring, so all the flowers in the garden had sprung), I made my invites and that little hand out that everyone gets telling them the order of the ceremony. I had friends that worked in the wine industry and organised grog at wholesale price, I also had my aunt and uncle offer a crate of champagne for our wedding present for the toast (that is good, getting people to provide you with booze/food for the wedding as your wedding present!) I got my friend to organise the band, and got mates rates. I worked with a girl who did a degree in photography, so I got her to take pics for our wedding so we didn't have to hire a professional. I got a friend of a friend to do catering, they were a semi-professional mob, and all I had to do is choose which nibbles I wanted served, the worked out how much food was needed based on the time the reception is and how many head. I also got my bridesmaids to wear what ever they wanted,, one of my b'maids was a goth and she made her skirt, it was a multi-layer black tule number, she looked fantastic :) as for bouquets, I picked lillies from the garden for myself on the morning, and I bought bunches of flowers for the b'maids the day before and arranged them myself. IP think the most expensive thing was hiring the infrastructure (chairs/marquee/portaloo/refrigeration unit/glasses/cutlery etc)To keep down the cost of food catering I opted for an afternoon reception.

All in all, I held my wedding party for 210 people for under $10,000, yeah, all the home-made stuff took a lot of my time, but I preferred it to rushing round putting my hand in my wallet for a whole bunch of 'professionals', every hour I spent making stuff/working things out with my friends made me more excited (not stressed!) about the day and when it arrived I had a fantastic day! Most people will still comment about how much they enjoyed our unique wedding. Another good tip is to get your close friends to do the worrying for you on the day. Get them worded up on any little mishap that could occur and entrust them to jump on the grenade, for instance, you don't wanna be the on the phone to the glasses hire people on the day of the wedding if the glasses haven't arrived yet or whatever, remember, it's your day to enjoy! You wanna be able to look back on a day full of joy, not a day full of stress. :)Y'know, I would have much preferred a registry office wedding and a couple of slabs of beer with my close friend in the park afterwards, but Dave wanted the whole shebang :rolleyes: -and who had to do ALL the organising?? Still, I had a good time, and it was as much a celebration of Dave surviving his bone marrow transplant as it was our union (he proposed to me as soon as it looked like he was going to make it :D )

Give me a break thin woman! :D
Ditto! :D
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Regular Member

Hey Mads! :D

Sounds like your wedding was awesome! We're probably going to get all of this done for under $5000! Im having my brother photograph so we're saving like $1500 that way! He also did our engagement photos. I am making our own invitations too. My maid of honor's step father does black and white photography so we'll have him take some shots during the ceremony.

And YES people I know this day is about each other!! :rolleyes: I just dont really have anyone to worry for me!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...