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My Family Don't Like My Fish


Guest WoodenCoyote

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Guest WoodenCoyote

I've always wanted nice fish ever since I was 8, but wasn't allowed. Now that I'm earning my own wages and taking care of myself I'm ready to fulfill my dreams so to speak [ hooray ]

But every time my mother, my father, or any other of my relatives see my tank or hear me talking about my fish, they get really cold. They never say anything, but I get sneers or eyerolls - the whole "she's wasting her time" deal. My aunt came over today and when I showed her the new tank I bought, she didn't try to act interested or even nice about it.

I know I shouldn't let it bother me, but it really makes me feel bad sometimes :(

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  • Regular Member

Yeah, my family is the same way sometimes. They think its silly. Don't let it get to you..they just don't understand how happy they make you. I never knew how much I was going to fall in love with my fish when i first started :heart . I'm always inviting in all my family and friends to show off my tanks and little guys and they think I'm a complete weirdo lol :rolleyes: , but I bet if you bought them a fish, in a couple weeks they would be the same way.

They shouldn't be mean about it though.. ;) I fish is just as loveable as any other pet, whether it be a dog or a cat, etc.

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:hug you'll make a great fish mommy. I remember when I went crazy and got my bettas like one after the other my mom thought I was nuts..don't let it get to you. They make great company and like gumbo said are just as loveable as our ''furry'' friends :)
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my family is the same way... :/ my mom kinda pretends to be interested int hat "Oh... thats very nice dear..." kinda way.. but everyone else says its a wast eof time and money... even my fish FRIENDS dont like my goldies! "You should make that 40 your dwarf puffer tank, or a big brackish like you want, get rid of the goldies" Grr!

just ignore them and bask in the fact that your happy, and no matter what you do, you cant controle their happyness!

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My roommates were the same way, I think if i had gotten a fish at home my family would have treated me that way, but when I tell them over the phone they sound interested (suprise!) but after my roommates saw how excited I was about my fish, they wanted some too, and sure enough we all have our own fishies now and we're all obsessed nerds, cept for my boyfriend whose fish i take care of. I wonder if he remembers he has a betta lol.

Meh, dont let it get to you. As long as you know your fish make you happy, thats all you need :)

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You know my husband doesnt seem to mind....but he made the comment that he thinks that people who raise fish or buy expensive ones and groom them for shows have no life. Um...just because its a hobby that isnt as popular as cars or sports doesnt mean if you partake in it you have no life. I told him you could just as easily say that someone who is obsessed with cars has no life.....

His argument was "oh well cars are more popular".

Ok hon, so you can go have no life with your cars and Ill go have no life with my goldfish and we'll both be happy lol!

People who arent interested in what you are are likely to act that way. They just dont understand or try to consider what an enjoyable hobby something may be to someone else.

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Well we can all say that we found a place to talk to people who are interested in the same thing and thats gf :D Even if some of our family dont really understand our exitement most every one here does and we can share what excites us about our fish.

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Guest 2 commons

When I adopted my first two fish my parents were very negative towards them. "They won't last long" "Don't waste your money on a big tank" and alot of other negative things. Until my fish started to grow and thrive. And those fish swam right into the hearts of my family. My parents and brother would come into my room "see" how I was doing but the whole time they would look at the fish swimming.

And then they started saying "WOW, look how big they are getting, are you going to get them a bigger tank soon?"

Now that I am teaching in a different city and can't take my fish with me right now my brother is taking care of them for me. And my grandma who used to think it was a waste of money has adopted one of my fish and named it Gertrude.

Anyhow the point of my story is that they may eventually come around and see that goldfish are just as fun.

Hang in there we here all understand the joy those little wigglers give.

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My husband and other family members are the same. My mom is the only one who really acts interested, even though I know she isn't. She loves me, and so she listens to me go on and on about my fish. My husband listens too, but he makes it clear that my fish hobby is kind of weird, and nerdy. They are just fish, and can't give you any affection, plus they don't even know who you are. They just follow you, since they associate you with food. That's what my husband says. My sister just laughs when I talk about fish. I have gotten use to it. They just don't understand, and probable never will. That's fine with me. I love my fish, and they love me too. They make me happy. :D

So don't worry about it. Your Goldies make you happy, and that is all that matters. It might be a good idea to talk to some of your family and let them know that it does hurt your feelings when they are mean, and act like your love for fish is dumb. It might help. They might not realize they are being so harsh, and then again they may realize it. You know your family best. Good luck, and no matter what you have us. We will always understand you. :hug

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theres always a family memeber thats like that. i know my dad doesnt like the idea of me having goldfishes. he just think its a waste of time and money. i'm going to show him that he's wrong and raise my goldies till there fat and BIG!! :D

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Guest JustJayde

Your money

Your home

Your fish.

Don't worry about what they think.... it is your life :) Please yourself first!

You can not please everyone else and be happy so enjoy what you want!

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One thing I have noticed, is that people may not understand the fish habit, but when gift giving time comes around, I tend to get fish presents, fish greeting cards, etc. I just received a beautiful suncatcher shaped like a goldfish :lol: One time I even got candy shaped like little goldfish!

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Guest JustJayde

LOL touchofsky!

Yea my mom thinks he is "just a fish. a stupid fish."

yet she helps buy goodies for him all the same LOL

AND I have caught her talking to him when she visits a time or two!

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My mother-in-law made fun of my fish. Until she came over and saw them. Baracus danced around in his tank and flashed his rainbow betta tail and Cody zipped around his tank and surfed in his bubbles. And she left saying how gorgeous my fish were!! She even commented on how clear Cody's tank was and how she never saw such a clean fish tank. Even my friends were like, "you got a what?" Now when they come over they spend more time wathcing the fish than the TV!!

Don't let them get to you, just enjoy your fish and maybe they will learn to love them too. And if not, its their loss.

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OMGOSH, It is amazing how we all sorta delt with the same crap from freinds family boyfreinds husbands exc....I guess we can all be happy we have a site we can run to and be like OMGOSH U R NOT GOING TO BELIEVE WHAT BUBBLES DID TODAY....EXC....

I remember my family was the same way, they were like what a waste how silly and when I first statred out and I kept looseing them becasue I didn"t kno what I was doing I would cry when they died and my sister was like DEZ U R SOO STUPIED!! there fish..and i"d be like well what if ur precious dogs died u"d feel the same way. And a guy I like didn't believe me that i couldn"t go out becasue my fish were sick...he called me a lier and dumped me on the spot...

Well, I now have 2 10 gal tanks 1 55 gal and A 2 1/2 gal. and it was my sister who bought me my 55gal as a gift. And now I catch my mom or sis looking at my tank and be like wow that one with the....is sooo gorgios or that one there is soo cute. and my new boyfreind is soo cute, he knows how much I love my fishes so he always askes how is ur fishies or what not and he helped me name my new ones!! They will come around or u will move on!!! thats all there is to it!!!

But just rememeber there ur babies and it diesn"t matted what neone has to say!! They are not a waste of money in fact if I own it to my fish for picking me out of my depression and getting me back on track!!

:newfish GOOD LUCK ON UR NEW TANK!! AND GOOD LUCK ON UR NEW BABIES!!! :newfish

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Hi WC and :welcome

You just come right over and chat with us, then! I think that's why most of us are here! My hubby gave me all my fish and then got all upset when we found out how much care they need... he wanted me to give my GF away!

But, I stuck to it and you know what! Last night he said - he actually said (it is now officially documented here!) - that he is glad he didn't make me get rid of my fish! :happydance And said he was sorry for making such a big deal about it!

When I got the new fish last week he thought they were so cool! He said - now I see more why you get so excited about it! He is coming around!

We don't really have any other family to give us a hard time about it but if we did - I'd just smile and say then please stop telling me about your (insert hobby) and I will stop telling you about my fish!

Hubby is so impressed now that they get so big and live so long - over time when people see that they may ask more questions! My friends think I am daft, then they come over are amazed at my fish! I catch their eyes drifting over to the tank!

Please tell us more about your fish! :listen:

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Guest Bigphil

It's a shame but most people just don't see fish as real pets. I have to admit I didn't my self unill I started keeping them. Many see them as nothing more than ornaments. Now I would be as upset if I lost Sue as I was when my dog. Toby died. My sister has kept a tank with some goldies for many years and looks afer them very well but she still thinks I'm silly the way I talk abou mine.

She doesn't mean to be hurtful, she just doesn't understand.

I can only repeat ruffled mumkins' advice.

"Your Goldies make you happy, and that is all that matters. It might be a good idea to talk to some of your family and let them know that it does hurt your feelings when they are mean, and act like your love for fish is dumb. It might help. They might not realize they are being so harsh, and then again they may realize it."

:heart:heart

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Guest Bigphil
It's a shame but most people just don't see fish as real pets. I have to admit I didn't my self unill I started keeping them. Many see them as nothing more than ornaments. Now I would be as upset if I lost Sue as I was when my dog. Toby died. My sister has kept a tank with some goldies for many years and looks afer them very well but she still thinks I'm silly the way I talk abou mine.

She doesn't mean to be hurtful, she just doesn't understand.

I can only repeat ruffled mumkins' advice.

"Your Goldies make you happy, and that is all that matters. It might be a good idea to talk to some of your family and let them know that it does hurt your feelings when they are mean, and act like your love for fish is dumb. It might help. They might not realize they are being so harsh, and then again they may realize it."

:heart   :heart

408186[/snapback]

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Guest WoodenCoyote

Thanks everyone! :D

Actually, I gave a speech about my fish and goldfish in general in my Communications class on Weds. History, care and the like. People really enjoyed it - especially the pictures. The photos of the bubble-eyes especially got a lot of reaction.

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Aww.. I'm glad to hear that they liked your speech. Sounds very interesting!

I'm very blessed to have a hubby who is also an animal lover. He says my shub is just like a lil doggy and greets my fish when he can and tries to make me female betta Feline flare at his finger...he even plays with the hermit crabs lol.

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